How to Support a Young Ballet Dancer: A Parent’s Guide

By Abbi Johnson, Ballet School Coordinator at Ajkun Ballet Theatre

Having spent most of my life as a dancer, ballet education is something I have experienced firsthand for many years. It has shaped not only my career, but also the way I understand training, growth, and the relationship young dancers develop with their art.

Now, as Ballet School Coordinator at Ajkun Ballet Theatre, I get to experience dance education from another perspective. I speak with young dancers and their families as they make decisions about training, auditions, performances, and their futures. Being on both sides has made me realize that some of the most important parts of supporting a young dancer actually happen outside the studio.

Parents naturally want to give their children every opportunity to succeed. But supporting a dancer does not always mean solving every problem, adding another class, or understanding every technical detail of ballet. Sometimes, the most valuable support is knowing when to encourage, when to listen, and when to let your dancer figure something out for themselves.

Here are some of the questions and concerns that come up time and time again in conversations with dancers and their families.

How Involved Should Parents Be in Ballet Training?

Young dancers need their parents. From getting them to class and performances to navigating schedules, expenses, and important decisions, dance training can require an enormous amount of family support. I don't think this should ever be underestimated.

As dancers become more advanced, however, learning to take ownership of their training is an important part of their education.

At Ajkun Ballet School, we foster a professional environment from the beginning. We want dancers to ask questions, understand why they are being asked to do something, and become active participants in their own development. Curiosity is something we genuinely encourage.

For parents, this can sometimes mean resisting the instinct to step in immediately. If your dancer has a question about a correction, rehearsal, or expectation, encourage them to ask their teacher. If they are unsure about something, help them think about how they might communicate it themselves.

Of course, there are situations in which a parent should become involved, particularly when a child's wellbeing or safety is concerned. But whenever appropriate, giving young dancers the opportunity to speak for themselves helps them develop confidence, accountability, and communication skills that they will need far beyond ballet.

What If My Dancer Isn’t Progressing as Quickly as Others?

Comparison is incredibly difficult to avoid in ballet. Dancers spend hours every day surrounded by mirrors and other dancers, and advancement can seem very visible: who was moved into a higher level, who received a particular role, who has more flexibility, or who mastered a step first.

But dancers simply do not develop on identical timelines.

One of the qualities I value most when meeting young dancers is individuality. Technique is important — of course it is — but perfect technique at a particular moment does not tell us everything about a dancer's potential. Curiosity, courage, musicality, work ethic, attitude, and a willingness to experiment and grow can be just as revealing.

This is particularly true during auditions. A dancer does not need to walk into the room already looking like a finished professional. Personally, I am much more interested in seeing a dancer who is engaged, receptive, and unafraid to try something differently.

Parents can help enormously by keeping the focus on their own dancer's development. Instead of always asking who received the lead role or who was promoted, try asking: What did you learn today? What are you working on? What feels better than it did a few months ago?

Progress in dance is rarely a straight line, and another dancer's success does not take anything away from your child's.

How Much Ballet Training Is Too Much?

More is not automatically better. I think this is especially important to remember in an art form where the instinct is so often to do more: take another class, stretch a little longer, rehearse it one more time.

Injury prevention is deeply embedded in the way we train at Ajkun. Our methodology emphasizes anatomical awareness, proper biomechanics, alignment, muscle balance, and progressively preparing the body for increasingly demanding movement. Dancers also need to learn how to recognize fatigue, recover effectively, and understand what their bodies are communicating to them.

But sustainability goes beyond what happens during class.

I strongly believe young dancers need a life outside the studio.

When you care deeply about ballet, it is very easy for it to become the subject of every conversation and every thought. Class leads to rehearsal, rehearsal leads to stretching at home, and free time becomes watching ballet videos or thinking about what needs to improve tomorrow. I know how easy it is to fall into that cycle.

And, frankly, it can become exhausting.

Time with friends and family, school, hobbies, rest, and interests that have absolutely nothing to do with dance are not distractions from becoming a serious dancer. They are part of growing into a healthy, interesting, well-rounded person.

“A dancer can be ambitious and disciplined while still having a life outside the studio. Those things are not mutually exclusive.”

In fact, I believe that balance can help make a performing career much more sustainable.

What Should Parents Do When a Young Dancer Feels Discouraged?

Sometimes the best thing you can do is listen.

A difficult ballet class can feel devastating to a young dancer. A correction may feel personal. Not receiving a role can feel like failure. Watching someone else achieve something they desperately wanted can make them question whether they are good enough. When you are living it every day, these things can feel much bigger than they might look from the outside.

A parent's instinct may be to fix the problem immediately. But not every difficult day requires intervention.

Corrections are part of training. Casting decisions are part of performing. Frustration is part of learning something that takes years to master. Experiencing those moments and learning how to move through them builds resilience.

That does not mean dismissing your dancer's feelings. Let them be disappointed. Ask them what happened. Listen before deciding what the situation means.

Then, when appropriate, help them turn the experience into a question: Is there something I can learn from this? Is there something I can ask my teacher? What can I control going forward?

There is, of course, an important difference between the normal frustrations of serious training and a situation that repeatedly makes a young dancer feel unsafe, diminished, or afraid. Parents should always take genuine concerns about their child's physical or emotional wellbeing seriously.

But sometimes a bad class really is just a bad class. Every dancer has them. Tomorrow is another opportunity.

What Qualities Help a Young Ballet Dancer Succeed?

Parents often understandably focus on technique. Is my dancer flexible enough? Are their feet good enough? Do they have enough turnout? Should they be doing more?

But some of the qualities that excite me most in young dancers cannot be measured that way.

I look for dancers who are curious and courageous in their approach. Dancers who are willing to take a risk, try something new, and explore movement rather than being so afraid of making a mistake that they never move beyond what already feels comfortable.

Work ethic and attitude matter enormously. So does respect — for teachers, fellow dancers, the work, and themselves.

And I really value dancers who ask questions.

Dance education should not teach young people to follow instructions without thought. We want dancers to understand their bodies, investigate movement, and develop their own artistic intelligence. A dancer who respectfully asks why? is not necessarily being difficult. They are learning to think for themselves.

Ultimately, our responsibility as educators is not simply to produce technically proficient dancers. It is to help develop independent artists who are engaged with what they are doing and equipped to make thoughtful decisions about their own bodies and careers.

Supporting the Person Behind the Dancer

You do not need to know everything about ballet to be an excellent dance parent.

You do not need to understand every correction, predict every casting decision, or have the perfect answer when your dancer is disappointed. Your role is different from that of their teacher, and I think that difference is incredibly valuable.

Encourage their curiosity. Give them room to advocate for themselves. Help them keep difficult days in perspective. Celebrate progress that has nothing to do with being better than somebody else. And remind them that ballet can be an enormously important part of their life without having to become their entire identity.

Having experienced dance education as both a dancer and now as Ballet School Coordinator, that is perhaps the biggest thing I wish more young dancers and their parents understood. Of course, we want to help them become better dancers. That's why they are here.

But we're also helping them grow into capable, curious, healthy people who happen to dance.

And, to me, the latter will always matter just as much as the former.

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Continue Exploring Dance Education at Ajkun Ballet School

Learn how the Ajkun Methodology integrates ballet training, anatomical awareness, biomechanics, injury prevention, and artistic development.

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Our Dance Education Guide is intended to be a growing resource for dancers and their families. If there is a question about ballet training, auditions, professional preparation, or supporting a young dancer that you would like us to address in a future article, we would love to hear from you.

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About Abbi Johnson

Abbi Johnson is an Australian-born ballet dancer, Senior Company Artist, and Ballet School Coordinator at Ajkun Ballet Theatre. She trained in Ajkun Ballet Theatre’s Trainee Program before joining the professional company.

Prior to Ajkun, Abbi trained at Central School of Ballet and Highgate Ballet School under Julie Cronshaw in London, before continuing her professional training at Joffrey Ballet School in New York City, where she was awarded a merit scholarship. She trained extensively in the Cecchetti Method and also attended programs with American Ballet Theatre and the Bolshoi Ballet Academy.